The Spanish Godmother: Mantilla Style & Protocol Guide

Being chosen as the godmother (madrina) at a Spanish wedding is one of the most special and emotional honors that exists. You're not only accompanying your son on one of the most important days of his life, but you become a central figure, a pillar of support and elegance. We understand that with this great honor come many questions, especially about protocol and attire. What should I wear? Can I wear a mantilla? What color?

Don't worry, we're here to guide you through every step. Think of us as that older sister or expert friend who accompanies you with calm and care so that on that day you shine with your own light, feeling confident and spectacular. In this complete guide, we'll resolve all your doubts about wearing the Spanish mantilla and the protocol that the perfect godmother should follow.

The Irreplaceable Role of the Godmother (Madrina)

In the tradition of Spanish weddings, the godmother (madrina) is much more than a guest of honor. Traditionally, she is the groom's mother, and her role is to accompany him to the altar, support him during the ceremony, and serve as one of the main hosts of the event alongside the godfather (padrino). Her presence symbolizes the union of the families and brings unique solemnity and elegance to the celebration.

Your role is one of calm, unconditional support, and serene elegance that inspires everyone. That's why your attire isn't just a dress—it's a declaration of the importance of this day. And one of the most emblematic and traditional pieces you can choose to crown your look is the mantilla.

The Spanish Mantilla: A Treasure of History and Art

The mantilla isn't just an accessory; it's a textile jewel loaded with history and meaning. Its origins go back centuries, evolving from the veils that women used to cover their heads as a sign of respect in temples. It was in the 17th and 18th centuries when the mantilla, especially lace mantillas, became popular among the ladies of Spanish aristocracy, becoming a symbol of distinction and elegance. Queens like Isabel II made it an emblem of Spanish fashion.

Wearing a mantilla is carrying a piece of art, a cultural legacy that connects your special moment with generations of Spanish women.

Types of Mantilla

Although there are various variations, mantillas are usually distinguished by their fabric and shape. The most common for godmothers are:

• Chantilly: A very fine and lightweight lace, originating from France, known for its transparency and delicate floral motifs. It's an elegant and subtle option.
• Blonda: A silk lace with larger, more defined motifs, often with a scalloped edge called "punta de castañuela" (castañuela point). It provides more body and presence than Chantilly.
• Tulle: Often used as a base on which details are embroidered. An embroidered tulle mantilla is a classic and timeless option.

The most common shape is rectangular, which is placed over a peineta (decorative comb) to give it height and structure.

Mantilla Protocol: How and When to Wear It

Knowing how to wear the mantilla is key to displaying it with the elegance it deserves. Don't worry, the protocol is simpler than it seems.

When Can the Godmother Wear a Mantilla?

The golden rule is simple: the godmother can wear a mantilla if the wedding is religious and celebrated during the day. The mantilla is a ceremonial garment and its use is traditionally linked to liturgical acts.

• Daytime weddings: This is the ideal scenario. The mantilla shines in all its splendor during the church ceremony. According to the strictest protocol, the godmother should remove it once the banquet begins, as its ceremonial function has ended. However, nowadays many godmothers choose to wear it throughout the celebration for comfort. Both options are accepted.
• Afternoon/evening weddings: Traditionally, the mantilla isn't worn at afternoon weddings. For these ceremonies, protocol suggests that the godmother opt for an elegant and discreet fascinator. Despite this, fashions change and it's increasingly common to see godmothers with mantillas at afternoon weddings. If it's your dream, and the couple agrees, you can adapt it by choosing lighter fabrics and more subtle designs.
• Civil weddings: The mantilla has no place at a civil wedding. Being a garment of religious origin and use, it would be completely out of place in a secular context. For a civil wedding, it's better to opt for a fascinator, a pamela (wide-brimmed hat, if daytime), or simply a spectacular hairstyle.

How is the Mantilla Placed?

The placement is fundamental for an impeccable result.

1. The peineta (decorative comb): The mantilla is secured with a high peineta, which is placed in a bun or updo. The height of the peineta is a personal choice, but traditionally combs made of tortoiseshell or similar materials in neutral tones are most appropriate.
2. The position: The peineta is placed at the crown of the head. The mantilla should fall symmetrically on both sides, covering the shoulders.
3. The length: The ideal length of the mantilla in front should reach hand height. In back, it should fall a few centimeters below the hip, never exceeding the length of the dress.
4. The fastening: It's discreetly attached to the dress shoulders with small pins or hidden brooches to prevent it from moving or blowing in the wind.

The most advisable thing is to leave its placement in the hands of your hairstylist. They're experts and will ensure it looks perfect and secure throughout the day.

The Perfect Color for the Godmother

Here comes another of the big questions. The choice of color for your dress and mantilla is crucial and marked by protocol.

Dress Colors

The fundamental rule is that no guest, including the godmother, should dress in white or a similar tone (ivory, off-white, champagne). This color is reserved exclusively for the bride. Additionally, traditionally, black has also been avoided due to its association with mourning, although modern trends have made this more flexible for evening weddings.

The ideal colors for the godmother are those that are elegant, flattering, and appropriate for the time of the event:

• For daytime weddings: Pastel tones like serenity blue, rose quartz, mint green, or lavender are fantastic options. Also vivid but elegant colors like red, Klein blue, or emerald green are perfect if you want a look with more impact.
• For evening weddings: The palette darkens. Navy blues, garnets, bottle greens, or metallic tones like silver or old gold are incredibly sophisticated.

Mantilla Color

The protocol for mantilla color is very clear and doesn't admit too many variations:

• Black mantilla: This is the traditional and most appropriate choice for the godmother. Black symbolizes respect and solemnity, ceding all protagonism to the bride, who is the only one who should dress in white. It's the most elegant and safe option.
• Mantillas in other colors: Although you may see mantillas in ivory, champagne, or even colors matching the dress, these options deviate from strict protocol. An ivory or similar colored mantilla can visually compete with the bride's veil. If you dream of a mantilla in a different color than black, it's essential to discuss it with the bride. Her opinion is the most important, and if she approves, you have her blessing.

Dress Code for the Perfect Godmother: Do's and Don'ts

For your look to be a perfect ten, keep these final tips in mind that will help you feel confident and get it just right.

What TO Do:

• Choose a long dress: Protocol dictates that the godmother should wear a long dress, both for day and evening weddings. It's the length that denotes maximum formality.
• Opt for sleeves: Whether long sleeves, three-quarter, or short, having covered shoulders is a sign of elegance and respect, especially at a religious ceremony.
• Seek harmony: Ensure that the style of the dress, mantilla, shoes, purse, and jewelry form a coherent and balanced ensemble.
• Communicate with the other godmother or bride's mother: Subtly coordinating styles or colors (to avoid matching) is a thoughtful gesture that's always appreciated.
• Prioritize comfort: You'll spend many hours standing. Choose elegant shoes that allow you to enjoy the day without suffering.

What NOT to Do:

• Avoid pronounced necklines or excessive slits: The elegance of a godmother resides in subtlety and sophistication, not ostentation.
• Don't overload with jewelry: The mantilla is already a very powerful piece. Opt for discreet jewelry, like beautiful earrings and perhaps a bracelet. A necklace could compete with the mantilla's lace.
• Beware of very shiny fabrics for daytime: Sequins or fabrics with a lot of shine are more appropriate for evening. During the day, choose quality fabrics like crepe, natural silk, or mikado.
• Don't wear a pamela if you're wearing a mantilla: They're two incompatible head accessories. One or the other.
• Never try to eclipse the bride: Remember, it's her big day. Your role is to accompany and shine with discreet and serene elegance.

Your Style, Your Decision

Being a godmother is an unforgettable experience. Although protocol is there to guide us, don't forget that the most important thing is that you feel like yourself, comfortable and happy. These rules are a foundation on which you can build your own style. Talk with the couple, listen to your instinct, and choose an ensemble that makes you feel like the proudest and most beautiful godmother in the world.

Because at the end of the day, the best style guide is the smile with which you accompany your son to the altar. And that, dear godmother, will look perfect on you.

For more information about Spanish wedding protocol, explore our guide on Catholic vs. civil weddings or tips on the perfect tie knot to complete the groom's look.